Day 907: Who Stole The Moon?

originally published June 25, 2014 I’d like to open today’s missive with a few kind words about President Richard M. Nixon. In an act of international fraternity and savvy diplomatic P.R., the Nixon administration celebrated the American victory in the Space Race by doling out gifts of free moon rocks to every state, every US […]

Day 906: Lord Gordon-Gordon & The Case Of The Tycoon’s Million Bucks

originally published June 24, 2014 How does one judge the success of a swindle? To my hopelessly naïve and tragically honest mind, I believe one must be able to enjoy the bounty of one’s evil in order to truly rate it as a win. Others might disagree, claiming the mere act of absconding with a […]

Day 897: Zoot Suit Violence

originally published June 15, 2014 One seldom looks very deeply into the lyrics of a modern swing-dance revival song. When Colin James and his Little Big Band sang about a Cadillac Baby, he was singing about a woman, one who enjoyed a particular Cadillac automobile. When Lou Bega prattled off his laundry list of desirable […]

Day 895: The Mysterious Misadventures Of D.B. Cooper

originally published June 13, 2014 Depending on what actually happened – and the sad truth is that we will probably never know – the D.B. Cooper story is either one of the greatest robberies of all time or a brilliant example of how a poor exit strategy can trip up any criminal. You’ve probably heard […]

Day 880: Litigious Humping, According To The Supreme Court

originally published May 29, 2014 When Paul Ferber found himself behind bars for participating in a routine business transaction, he was outraged. How dare they? So he sold a couple of video tapes to an undercover police officer – is that a crime? Even if the videos featured young boys masturbating? It’s art! Maybe the […]

Day 871: Give Me Three Tasty Scoops… Of Murder!

originally published May 20, 2014 If you wanna sling butterscotch ripple in Glas’, y’better have a strong fookin’ stomach. In the early 1980’s, Scottish gangsters had stumbled upon an insidious yet somehow brilliant front for their nefarious goings-on: ice cream trucks. While the chipper little bleeps of a pre-recorded children’s ditty lured hungry kids clutching […]

Day 870: The Cruel Capture & Cunning Calculation Of Fanny Kelly

originally published May 19, 2014 Classic tales of the old west are filled with men who are forced by circumstance to be MEN. By the code of the west, a guy’s holster must be overflowing with the gooey, musky froth of machismo. Whether it’s Marshal Will Kane awaiting a fleet of vengeful gunmen at high […]

Day 867: The Case Of The Missing (Let’s Assume Dead) Person

originally published May 16, 2014 During the aftermath of the English Civil War, while a spanking-new parliamentary monarchy was struggling to gain its balance and move forward, a number of questions popped up like bulbous weeds all over the field of law and order. Land claims, the reach of justice, the decision of whether or […]

Day 843: Locked Up For Life, And Then Some (Part 2)

originally published April 22, 2014 Yesterday’s article began with Bernie Madoff’s 150-year prison sentence and proceeded to climb up the ranks in search of the longest term of incarceration ever handed down by an earth-bound court (for the purposes of consistency I’m ignoring the Kryptonian sentence of General Zod and those other two inside that […]

Day 842: Locked Up For Life, And Then Some (Part 1)

originally published April 21, 2014 On June 29, 2009, District Judge Denny Chin sentenced Bernie Madoff to a whopping 150 years in prison for defrauding thousands of investors and ripping off more than $65 billion for his own pocket from people who presumably actually worked for that money. Madoff had committed an act of wickedness […]