Day 840: Baby You Can Drive My Car – Or Better Still, Your Robot Can Do It

originally published April 19, 2014 As I trepidatiously shuffle toward the edge of the board, ready to leap into the warm waters of turning 40 this year, I realize it’s time to release my hopes of seeing the skies filled with flying cars. That Jetsons-style future-scape is not going to cross paths with my personal […]

Day 828: The Elaborate Conspiracy Behind Laundry Symbols

originally published April 7, 2014 As part of my public service hours after my arrest last weekend at that Costco restaurant for soaking my elbows in the relish bins (and in my defense, I have dry skin and that relish is incredibly soothing), I want to talk a little bit about laundry. Most of us […]

Day 805: Smile, You’re Always On Candid Camera

originally published March 15, 2014 Right this very minute, unless you’re in your own home with the windows blacked out, under three layers of blankets with aluminum foil insulating every crook of the room, you are being watched. Perhaps not actively watched by anyone with a pulse, but there are electronic eyes everywhere. City streets, […]

Day 803: The Shocking (Pun Tragically Intended) War Of Currents

originally published March 13, 2014 While ruminating on beer and movies and the mighty Cleveland Browns may fuel the tip-tap-thump of my dancing fingers, every so often I owe it to myself and to my rapt and generous audience to dip into the unknown. A project such as this is by necessity a learning experience, […]

Day 791: Surviving Shabbat

originally published March 1, 2014 I think for a change of pace today I’m going to throw caution to the flatulent wind and boldly discuss religion. First of all, Shabbat Shalom to all my Jewish friends. Secondly, you’d better not be reading this before sundown, lest the wrath of the almighty rain down upon you, […]

Day 768: Archimedes Spins The Wheel

originally published February 6, 2014 There are days when I sit at my desk, look at what I do (my tedious day job, not this particular knuckle-scrunchingly thrilling task) and the weight of my uninspiring career seems to drag down my insides like a kidney stone the size of a tennis shoe. I considered myself to be wildly innovative the […]

Day 743: Make Way For Madman Muntz!

originally published January 12, 2014 While the world heaps its historical praise upon the Thomas Edisons, the Henry Fords, and the Giordi Lobzhanidzes (he invented the modern garlic press), we forget that for each titan of invention who helped to shape our twisted, wicked world, there are many who remain practically anonymous. I’m not talking […]

Day 728: Creative Anti-Crime Tech

originally published December 28, 2013 Presbycusis. Not a word one hears often in polite conversation, in fact it’s not a word that the good folks at Microsoft felt necessary to plop into their default dictionary, according to the squiggly red snake of shame underneath what I just typed. But among those who have devoted their […]

Day 715: When Cars Were Fun – The John DeLorean Story

originally published December 15, 2013 For many of us, shopping for a new car is a tedious and uninspiring chore. Sure, the end result is gratifying and fun (and damn expensive), but unless you’re in the market for a high-end speed machine or something with a gold-plated mini-bar and an anti-pursuit oil-slick hidden in the […]

Day 676: That Forbidden Buzz

originally published November 6, 2013 I need to preface today’s topic by pointing out that we at 1000 Words Industries endeavor to produce family-friendly articles, whether our topic is murderous castles or candy that needs to be flushed from the world. Also, we tend to do a fair portion of our research at what is […]