Day 479: There’s More Than One Way To Pluck A Chicken

originally published April 23, 2013 I sat down to write this morning and found myself a little bit hungry. Good news! The first item that squirmed through the button-hole of randomosity belonged to chicken lollipops. Okay, they’re just the inner sections of chicken wings with bones sticking out of them. Nothing special, but it was […]

Day 470: Coke – The Real Thing. Except When It’s Not.

originally published April 14, 2013 There comes a moment in every parent’s experience when they need to sit down with their kids, and have a solemn and serious discussion about one of the great psychological scars across the puffy face of our entitled western culture. The moment when one of our corporate institutions, one of […]

Day 445: The Mighty Cheeto

originally published March 20, 2013 Consider the Cheeto: crisp, yielding, with the audible snap of a thousand tiny hands sharing one unison clap. It lands upon the tongue in a Riverdance of dissolution, its crunchy remnants clip-clopping past the molars in a crumb stampede (a ‘crumpede’ if you will), down the gullet’s hungry waterslide. Its […]

Day 439: Thirst Is A Battlefield

originally published March 14, 2013 You walk into your local convenience store, peruse through the salty offerings of starch-based stoner food to accompany your quiet night of magic mushrooms and Nicholas Spark movies, when you decide you’d best grab a beverage. Little do you know, behind the double-pane glass of the store’s cooler lies a […]

Day 409: Meddling With The Elixir Of Life – The Coffee Chronicles

originally published February 12, 2013 As open-minded as I may be when it comes to matters of food (I’ll subject my palate to almost anything that doesn’t look too Fear Factor-ish), eclectic art (I’m mastered the act of nodding politely) and sex (I once did it with the lights on), I have to admit – […]

Day 406: Theme From A Supper Place

originally published February 9, 2013 It’s the weekend, and once again my thoughts turn to food. It’s hard to find time to eat well during the week; after rehearsals, classes, skeet-shooting workshops, extreme hobo-fights, hacky-sack circles, taebo, Lamaze (we aren’t pregnant, just keeping our technique fresh), scuba-suit fittings, volunteering in a shelter for wayward lizards […]

Day 392: My Journey To Helles And Bock

originally published January 26, 2013 Thursday night I was invited to my first beer release party. Having attended a few movie premieres, album releases, and even a release party for a crisper hue of goldenrod paper (the printing business is a savage and thrilling business), I was eager to go. Even more so because the […]

Day 386: Cookin’ Up A Mess O’ Yum

originally published January 20, 2013 If my beloved reading audience will allow, I would like to shill for a minute. While we here at 1000 Words Labs earn enough from our side income as puppeteer-superheroes to make sponsorship unnecessary, we nevertheless believe in paying tribute to those wondrous businesses who fuel our survival throughout these […]

Day 298: The Shadowy Side Of Chinese Take-Out

originally published October 24, 2012 Approximately every three to twenty-one days, I endure a quiet internal churning for Chinese food. This could be a low-boil addiction to MSG, or maybe it’s just a hearty appreciation for the delicious Szechuan Chicken at my favorite place. So when I awoke to discover today’s topic was Chinese cuisine, […]

Day 289: An Evening Of Duo Cocktails

originally published October 15, 2012 Here are three perfectly good reasons I plan on drinking tonight: It’s Monday. Not only Monday, but it’s the Monday of a five-day week – the first of four consecutive five-day weeks until my next long weekend. It still baffles me that, as an advanced society, we have not yet […]