Day 218: Spanks A Lot! National Masturbation Day

originally published August 5, 2012 “Don’t knock masturbation, it’s sex with someone I love.” – Alvy Singer, from Annie Hall, 1977. After writing yesterday about powerful, mighty humans who can lift, throw, drag and shove more than any human logically should, today I’m flipping things around and writing about a sport that anyone can (and […]

Day 215: Prop 215

originally published August 2, 2012 To those of you who have been asking if Day 420 is going to feature an article about marijuana, the answer is probably not. Too obvious, and besides, the use of ‘420’ as slang for smoking pot was uncommon in my youth. I will, however, spend today discussing 215. Specifically, […]

Day 212: When White People Suck – The Blackface Story

originally published July 30, 2012 How thrilled I was to learn that I’d be penning my daily tithe to the Goddess of Obligation on a band I’d never heard of. A band from the 1840’s, a decade not known for producing chart-busting, spear-to-your-ear, rockin’ smash hit songs. In fact, Wikipedia only lists three songs from […]

Day 202: Bad Advice No One Should Take – Preparing For High School

originally published July 20, 2012 Okay, so you’re male, fourteen/fifteen years old, and heading to a new high school in a month and a half. No one knows you, so no one can call bullshit on the version of you that you choose to sell as the truth. But what to do? Who do you […]

Day 186: The Great Hush – Secret Societies At Work

originally published July 4, 2012 I have been waiting for months to write an article about secret societies. I’m fascinated by them; none have ever admitted me as a member (well, none that I can talk about), and I think it’s just adorable that people meet under the veil of night, believing that their membership […]

Day 182: Counting The Jedi

originally published June 30, 2012 For the record, this article is not about Star Wars. It’s about faith. Religion. Spirituality. The Force. I’m referring to the Force in this time, in this galaxy. I’m talking about a religion to which hundreds of thousands of people belong, yet for which there is no church, no temple, […]

Day 158: The Unexpected Cult Of JoinMe

originally published June 6, 2012 This is Danny Wallace. If you haven’t heard of him yet, you probably will soon. I don’t like devoting articles in this experiment to other comedy writers; it tends to come off as pandering and a little wankish. So instead I’d like to focus on one of his works – […]

Day 53: A Hunk-a Hunk-a Burning Matrimonial Commitment

originally published February 22, 2012 Talk about timely and poignant. Right in time for the annual day when thousands of people start to regret their spontaneous decision to get married on Valentine’s Day in Vegas, I get to write about true love. Vegas-style. My wife and I visited Las Vegas for the first time on […]