Day 531: Ground Control To Major Space-Monkey

originally published June 14, 2013 Today I’d like to take a somber moment and toast the fallen. No, not our fallen troops, and not the victims of horrific recent disasters – they deserve our respect, but they also get a lot of respect from writers far more respectable than myself. I prefer to shine the […]

Day 530: The Bestselling Hoaxes

originally published June 13, 2013 The notion that ‘sex sells’ is a concept older than advertising itself. The beauty within that tiny catchphrase is that, for a long time, advertisers could manipulate the concept and the public really had no idea that they were merely succumbing to the prodding of their most base urges. We […]

Day 529: Max Fleischer – The Ani-Maker

originally published June 12, 2013 Unless you are well-versed in the history of cartoons, you probably know only a handful of names related to the industry: Walt Disney, Seth McFarlane, Matt Groening, and if you really remember your Looney Tunes, Chuck Jones. But any of those four would tip their quills in an industry salute […]

Day 528: Fully Mooned Fever

originally published June 11, 2013 In the wild, the act of exposing one’s hindquarters to another of one’s species is generally looked upon as an act of sexual submission, an invitation to taxi down the ol’ carnal runway, cross-check for predators in the bushes, then take flight in a wild spree of jungle-humping like the […]

Day 527: When Molasses Attacks!

originally published June 10, 2013 I know – 1919 was a very different age. Morals were gauged by what now seems an antiquated perspective, cultural dynamics were driven by significantly different forces, and the very fundamental tenets of American life existed within parameters and motivations that would have been radically different than those which we […]

Day 526: Spitting In The Face Of June’s Holidaylessness

originally published June 9, 2013 We are almost a third of the way through the month of June, and it occurred to me that I have neglected to provide us with our monthly observances, our reasons to celebrate something… anything. Two days ago I wrote a piece on National Doughnut Day, but that won’t be […]

Day 525: Wherefore Art Thou, Pluto?

originally published June 8, 2013 Poor, poor Pluto. For many people, the demotion of Pluto from the ranks of the Elite Nine backing vocalists to the Sun’s great whizzbang show was nothing short of a tragedy. Rallies were held, people marched through the streets with pale orange warpaint smeared across their sweaty faces, and supporters […]

Day 524: In Praise Of The Mighty Doughnut

originally published June 7, 2013 The month of June is one often scowled at by office drones such as myself every year. Sure, we dads get a little love on the third Sunday, but there isn’t a single day off throughout the entire month. Where’s the joy? What do I do with that innate vibration […]

Day 523: The Pilecki Affair

originally published June 6, 2013 Anyone with even a little Polish blood fluming through their veins may want to pour themselves a tall glass of national pride while they read today’s article. There are war heroes, there are kick-ass war heroes, and then there’s Witold Pilecki. In August of 1943, Pilecki singlehandedly changed the very […]

Day 522: The Battle Scars Of Action Park

originally published June 5, 2013 Anyone over the age of thirty probably has the ability to look back upon the playgrounds, waterparks and amusement parks of their youth and remember how incredibly easy it once was to spill a little blood, or break a bone or two in the name of fun. I remember a […]